25': LA Galaxy 0-0 Charlotte FC

Venue: Dignity Health Sports Park
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LINE-UPS
LA Galaxy
Jonathan Bond, Martín Cáceres, Jalen Neal, Julian Aude, Calegari, Gastón Brugman, Marky Delgado, Memo Rodriguez, Tyler Boyd, Ricard Puig, Javier Hernández.
Subs: Raheem Edwards, Chris Mavinga, Dejan Joveljic, Daniel Aguirre, Jonathan Klinsmann, Oriol Rosell, Efrain Álvarez, Kelvin Leerdam, Gino Vivi.
^{____________________________}
Charlotte FC
Kristijan Kahlina, Harrison Afful, Bill Tuiloma, Nathan Byrne, Adilson Malanda, Derrick Jones, Ashley Westwood, Brandt Bronico, Karol Swiderski, Kerwin Vargas, Justin Meram.
Subs: Jaylin Lindsey, Patrick Agyemang, Pablo Sisniega, Jan Sobocinski, Joseph Mora, Guzmán Corujo, Christopher Hegardt, Brandon Cambridge, Nicholas Scardina.
MATCH EVENTS via ESPN
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It’s that time of year again! Love is in the air along with all the plant jizz, and I am looking for the someone who is willing to venture out into this yellow, dusty mess with me, and then come home and just take a nap before our sinuses close up in anger and we cough ourselves to sleep. I am looking for someone to vent my mundane troubles too, someone that I know would be there to help with whatever may come up, and someone that I can laugh with, someone to cry with, someone that would just run with a crazy idea without hesitation.
Enough about me! Let’s talk about what you may be looking for! Are you looking for that special someone? You know, the one that laugh with on a daily basis. The one that you can have an entire conversation with using nothing but funny pictures? Are you looking for the creepy and the kooky? What about the mysterious and spooky? Would that someone be a person with a mohawk that is forever changing colors? How about a neatly trimmed beard that smells of sandalwood? What about the smell of Old Spice? Would that person also happen to have a few piercings and tattoos? Do you like the twang of a Southern accent? What if that accent was happen to be from a guy who is open minded? Do you enjoy a quick wit? How about being fluent in smartassary? How about a guy that is taking care of way too many fish? How about a guy who is starting to find grey hairs in his beard and is embracing the chance to become a silver fox?
Would you like for that person to be able to build a computer and change your oil all in the same day? How about having your tires rotated, breaks changed? I can even do headlights and air filters! Does the thought of helping turtles cross a busy road and helping tiny tadpoles stay safe with a pool of water during the summer tickle your fancy? Would you like to come home and have a pot roast and chocolate cake waiting for you? How about coming home to that random piece of IKEA furniture fully assembled? What about someone who would help while you built the IKEA? Does the idea of a guy who has reached the level of old that he enjoys puzzles intrigue you? How about if he has a love for cats that like to sit on said unfinished puzzles? Are you looking for a guy who can change your oil, replace your brakes, and cook you dinner in the same day? How about a guy who is good with his hands and knows it? If you answered yes to any of these questions, the nerdy home maker package is for you! Who doesn’t want help around the house, basic maintaince taken care of, and some good dick?
Do you have an endless supply of DIY ideas? Well look no further because I do too! Ever wanted a stylish bat house or raised garden bed? I have made both! Would you want a greenhouse? I have plenty of ideas for that! Do you like watching a guy get dirty restoring canoes or building trailers? Do you have a Mad Max fantasy you want to live out? Do you want a house straight from the shire? I have the skills and the 3d printers to make you swoon with possibilities! If you answered yes to any of these questions, the glistening geek package is for you! What’s not to love about watching someone you like getting sweaty while watching your ideas come to life?
For a limited time, if you pick both packages, I will add in the nerdy outdoorsman package for no extra charge! Want to stay in one weekend and marathon Doctor Who, Star Trek, or Futurama? Do you want to play Don’t Starve Together, DnD, or Civ 6? How about Nerf gun fight, or a game of Mario for bragging rights? Feel like staying up late bundled under a load of blankets watching B movies or playing all manor of video, board, or card games? Feel like getting outdoors instead? I can offer spontaneous adventures that may include wondering aimlessly, hiking, and floating blissfully down a river which singing the PACMAN theme song! Random acts of hilarity that could include striking poses and quoting pop culture references! Are you more of a night owl? I can offer you a view of the stars with my telescope!
How about it? Wanna get itchy eyes and a runny nose with me?

It’s that time of year again! Love is in the air along with all the plant jizz, and I am looking for the someone who is willing to venture out into this yellow, dusty mess with me, and then come home and just take a nap before our sinuses close up in anger and we cough ourselves to sleep. I am looking for someone to vent my mundane troubles too, someone that I know would be there to help with whatever may come up, and someone that I can laugh with, someone to cry with, someone that would just run with a crazy idea without hesitation.
Enough about me! Let’s talk about what you may be looking for! Are you looking for that special someone? You know, the one that laugh with on a daily basis. The one that you can have an entire conversation with using nothing but funny pictures? Are you looking for the creepy and the kooky? What about the mysterious and spooky? Would that someone be a person with a mohawk that is forever changing colors? How about a neatly trimmed beard that smells of sandalwood? What about the smell of Old Spice? Would that person also happen to have a few piercings and tattoos? Do you like the twang of a Southern accent? What if that accent was happen to be from a guy who is open minded? Do you enjoy a quick wit? How about being fluent in smartassary? How about a guy that is taking care of way too many fish? How about a guy who is starting to find grey hairs in his beard and is embracing the chance to become a silver fox?
Would you like for that person to be able to build a computer and change your oil all in the same day? How about having your tires rotated, breaks changed? I can even do headlights and air filters! Does the thought of helping turtles cross a busy road and helping tiny tadpoles stay safe with a pool of water during the summer tickle your fancy? Would you like to come home and have a pot roast and chocolate cake waiting for you? How about coming home to that random piece of IKEA furniture fully assembled? What about someone who would help while you built the IKEA? Does the idea of a guy who has reached the level of old that he enjoys puzzles intrigue you? How about if he has a love for cats that like to sit on said unfinished puzzles? Are you looking for a guy who can change your oil, replace your brakes, and cook you dinner in the same day? How about a guy who is good with his hands and knows it? If you answered yes to any of these questions, the nerdy home maker package is for you! Who doesn’t want help around the house, basic maintaince taken care of, and some good dick?
Do you have an endless supply of DIY ideas? Well look no further because I do too! Ever wanted a stylish bat house or raised garden bed? I have made both! Would you want a greenhouse? I have plenty of ideas for that! Do you like watching a guy get dirty restoring canoes or building trailers? Do you have a Mad Max fantasy you want to live out? Do you want a house straight from the shire? I have the skills and the 3d printers to make you swoon with possibilities! If you answered yes to any of these questions, the glistening geek package is for you! What’s not to love about watching someone you like getting sweaty while watching your ideas come to life?
For a limited time, if you pick both packages, I will add in the nerdy outdoorsman package for no extra charge! Want to stay in one weekend and marathon Doctor Who, Star Trek, or Futurama? Do you want to play Don’t Starve Together, DnD, or Civ 6? How about Nerf gun fight, or a game of Mario for bragging rights? Feel like staying up late bundled under a load of blankets watching B movies or playing all manor of video, board, or card games? Feel like getting outdoors instead? I can offer spontaneous adventures that may include wondering aimlessly, hiking, and floating blissfully down a river which singing the PACMAN theme song! Random acts of hilarity that could include striking poses and quoting pop culture references! Are you more of a night owl? I can offer you a view of the stars with my telescope!
How about it? Wanna get itchy eyes and a runny nose with me?

A special thanks to u/bluefishcake for the wonderful original story and sandbox to play in.
A special thanks to my editors LordHenry7898, RandomTinkerer, Swimming_Good_8507, CatsInTrenchcoats, and KLiCKonthat.
And a big thanks to the authors and their stories that inspired me to tell my own in this universe. RandomTinkerer (City Slickers and Hayseeds), Punnynfunny (Denied Operations), CompassWithHat (Top Lasgun), CarCU131 (The Cook), and Rhion-618 (Just One Drop)
Hy’shq’e Ay Si’am (Thank you noble friends)
Chapter 30: A Promise Kept
Kalai stepped off the shuttle to the Vaida’s headquarters and into a running tackle-hug from Sitry. “Oh Kalai, I could kill you right now! You got to see the Great Barrier Reef in person, you bitch!” Sitry’s cheerful voice was muffled from where she was still buried in her chest. Kalai staggered backwards a pace or two, happy to be back from her whirlwind adventure around Earth with her father.
Naranjo and Papa Rhaxiid were there on the platform to welcome her back too, but their welcomes were more sedate.
“Not to mention you got out of work for half our damn trip. Ugh, it’s so not fair!” Naranjo huffed as Kalai gave him a sisterly hug.
Papa Rhaxiid reached up and chucked her chin before turning to lead the way back inside from the forested platform. “Welcome back, sweet-sprout, we’ve missed you. Come on, we’ll get you settled again and off to work. There’s quite a bit you need to catch up on if you want your credits.”
The chuckles from the twins behind her were full of sibling malice, but she knew how to shut the pair of them up. “Papa Rhaxiid? I’ve got the paper on Biodiversity in the Reef you asked for, along with the dissection report and stomach content analysis of the tuna we caught. I want to put the finishing touches on it and do a final proofread first before I send them to you.” The man turned and gave her a warm smile as they entered the building.
“Good, why don’t you go take your things back up and say hello to Andy? I’ll give you an hour and a half to get freshened up, then I want you to report to Aquarium 12 with Dr. Sor’ansa. You can put your snorkeling practice to work there.” Papa Rhaxiid walked the three of them to the residential elevator. “I’m heading back to my office. Andy’s been requested by Maetro Pae’ella to work the kitchens for something called ‘Bison burgers'. Apparently it’s a type of indigenous bovine that the eastern Bands raise. That and something from Europe called ‘French Fries’.”
Kalai couldn’t help but get excited as she and her siblings piled into the elevator back to their little shared apartment. Sure the food she’d had all over the place was good, but so far nothing had been able to compare to Andy and his Salishian cooking.
“Nerd, I can’t believe you cheated and did work on your vacation." Naranjo broke the silence of the elevator after a little bit and stuck his tongue out at her.
“Spit to windward, you vain little weed. Don’t hate me because I’m awesome.” Kalai’s riposte caused Naranjo to fold his arms and huff. Sitry simply ambushed her with an ear flick.
The elevator door opened to their floor before Kalai couldn’t bear the silence from Sitry any longer. “So, did you bag him yet, you lucky bitch?”
“No she hasn’t!” Naranjo’s singsong mockery of his sister interrupted Sitry’s response. “Papa hasn’t let Sitry even NEAR Andy without one of them around!”
“Rub it in, you snitch, besides, he did kiss me first,” Sitry preened happily as she playfully shoved Kalai’s shoulder.
Kalai pretended to stumble and almost caught Sitry’s foot, but she was just a hair too slow. “Yeah, and then you gave him a black eye, you clod.”
“Will you let it go? It was an accident!”
“It’s not even the only one he got either." Naranjo’s interjection stopped her right in front of their door.
“Wait, what? Who hurt him this time?” Kalai let her bag thunk to the floor as she turned to look accusingly between Sitry and Narny.
Sitry folded her arms and her ears twitched back as she shot a dark look at their door. “He ‘fell down’ yesterday while out at one of the Hatcheries we gave to the Hwatcoms. Mrs. Toloui nearly had a fit! She said she could smell another human on him and that he was covered in blood!”
Narny nodded primly as Kalai tried to process what they were telling her. “WHAT? Did she call out the militia? Track down whoever hurt him?”
“No, and he refused treatment and insisted that no one did it to him! When papa tried to talk to him, Andy said some stupid human macho shit about pain healing and birds liking scars. I don’t know, sometimes humans… they’re frickin’ insane!”
The door shot open and there stood Andy. His left eye was an angry puffy yellow and blue mess, and there were three points on his lips where a dark cinnabar line marked a crack. Kalai and her siblings stood in wide eyed shock at his sudden appearance and the only sound was the music emanating from the common room behind him.
Andy looked up and down at the three without saying a word. He cocked an eyebrow and snagged Kalai’s bag before any of them could react and cleared the doorway for them.
Kalai sputtered at the impropriety but Naranjo and Sitry just shrugged and walked in after Andy. “Femboys, am I right?” Narny whispered to Kalai as he passed. Kalai followed behind and was greeted by the white fluff-ball, Puck, who hopped up and down, whining for attention. She bent down and started scratching his ears and back. While Puck rubbed up against her hands, Andy settled back down at the table where his omnipad was hooked up to a keypad. Her heart started to sink a bit and Kalai shot Sitry a jealous look before the music came to a sudden halt and Andy interrupted the beginnings of her pity party.
“Ok, Kem’ira, I got the pics now and I’m telling you to declare yourself to the farmers first! I guarantee if you tell them you’re with the new DNR and you’re there to kill all the Scotch Broom in their pasture lands, they’ll stop trying to shoot you for trespassing!”
Kalai’s mood jumped up a bit. It’s not that he doesn’t care to see me, he’s in a meeting!
“No, no I’m not coming out to talk this over with them, I’ve got my own work to do! Either you start talking to folks like I showed you how, or ask the militia to give you one of their armored catsuits to wear under your uniform… Uh-huh, good luck." Andy hung up on the call and leaned back as Puck scampered over and hopped up in his lap.
Andy rubbed his temples before shaking his head. He seemed to relax a bit and Puck slid off to follow Sitry to the kitchen. Andy looked over and gave Kalai a happy smile that made her flush. “Welcome back! So how was the land down under? That tuna was fan-frickin’-tastic, if you aren’t sick of seafood I’ll do something fancy with it tomorrow to celebrate your coming back. Can’t tonight though, I got volun-told to be head chef tonight and I… Oh damnit! I’m late! Come to dinner, burgers and fries Indian style tonight. Gotta run!” With that, Andy went dashing out the door with Puck barking and scrambling along after him.
Kalai felt her heart sink back down again, as he left. “Andy I-” She started but he was gone.
“Yeah, it’s been like that for the whole week. The only time we get to hang out is dinner.” Sitry commiserated as she took Kalai’s bag into their room. “On the other hand, we might get to catch up during the family meal tonight.”
The dinner was delicious, though a bit weird. It tasted alright, but there was a certain aftertaste on the sandwich that just didn’t sit right with Kalai. She just couldn’t put her finger on it. The french fries more than made up for it though, and Mama Sakalbi had to hold a science trivia contest to see who got the last little handful.
Kalai and Narny were already silently plotting with each other for their revenge against their sister who had won and refused to share the last few matchsticks when Andy finally joined their table. He was sweaty and he smelled of woodsmoke and french fries. Kalai jumped up and offered him a seat next to her with a nervous smile. He took it gratefully and seemed to sag a bit as he gulped down a glass of water.
“Andy, I think you may be finding your calling as a culinary ambassador,” Mama Aftasia beamed. “A toast to the chef!”
Andy gave a shy smile and looked down as Kalai and the rest of the family gave a hearty ‘Here, here!”
“It’s a simple enough recipe; it’s just using bison instead of cow, that’s all, and I don’t know anyone who’d turn down hand cut fresh fries. It’s kind of hard to screw up.”
“Young man, you are speaking to a woman who found a way to take cold water and dried wumpa flakes and wind up with a Class-4 fire. Cooking has always seemed like ‘blight mysticism’ to me, and these foods? These flavors? Nothing short of a Greenwood miracle in my opinion." Mama Aftasia continued her praise of Andy, which only caused him to shrink even lower in his seat.
“To be honest, I like your salmon better,” Kalai said, and the whole table went silent. Kalai held her ground though, and was rewarded with a tired but genuine laugh from Andy that brought him back out of his shell.
“You know, I do too. My Clan were fisherpeople, not buffalo chasers.” Andy gave Kalai a cheeky grin, which she returned happily, her heart glowing. Mama Aftasia and Mama Sakalbi both blinked in bemusement at Andy’s statement while Sitry just giggled.
“Speaking of which, Andy, I received a call from Elder Alex Hwatcom.” Papa Rhaxiid’s change of subject instantly perked Andy up, and he stared silently, waiting. “He extended an invitation to our family to attend his family gathering this Friday-”
“Alex said that? He used those words?” Andy shook his head in shock as he interrupted Papa Rhaxiid. The table went quiet and everyone held their breath as they looked between the two men.
Papa Rhaxiid adopted as good an impression of the human Elder as he could. “I’d like to extend an invitation for you and your family to be guests at our family gathering this saturday up at the White… something… lodge-”
“The White Ram Lodge?” Andy sat forward, interjecting again as the color drained from his face.
“Yes, that’s the one! I asked if we could bring anything since the last time they hosted us they put on that wonderful spread. He said if we could bring a few salmon for the family, that would be wonderful.”
Andy leaned back and took another sip of ice water before holding the glass to his blackened eye. “Alex Hwatcom… just invited you… to a gathering… and he told you to ‘bring a few salmon’? Do you realize what a huge honor this is?”
Rhaxiid looked from his wives to his children with mild concern. “Um, I thought it was only dinner, but your reaction tells me there’s more significance to this than I originally thought. I was thinking about our stocks of adult Sockeye, but then I remembered in his story how important King Salmon are. Of course, I’d like to defer to you for the choice since you know these animals and the cultural expectations with this invitation better than we do.”
Andy was silent for a moment before he put the glass down. “I’d recommend a ‘hard no’ to all your clone stock!” Now it was the Vaidas’ turn to be shocked, as each of Kalai’s Erbian family’s jaws dropped in synch. Before anyone could say anything, Andy continued, “You need to bring wild-caught. Farm-raised salmon wouldn’t… well we can tell, and you can taste the difference between them. We need to go fishing!” Kalai leaned towards Andy slightly as he lowered his head and started mumbling to himself. She was just able to make out what he was saying to himself as Mama Sakalbi and Mama Aftasia began whispering to each other. “...need to get the Gillnetter out of storage, check what’s running and select the mesh. I’m gonna need a deckhand too.”
Kalai reached a hand out but stopped short of touching him. “Andy?”
He popped up and spoke for the whole table to hear. “I need a shuttle to the mainland and a waiver against the fishing ban. I’ve got to get my boat and the drum ready for sea ” Rhaxiid and Aftasia sputtered in confusion, but Mama Sakalbi had a shadow fall over her, and her ears pulled back.
“Do you mean to say you want to go out on the water? Risk the ecological balance for… dinner?”
Andy looked Sakalbi dead in the eye and gave her a firm nod. “Why don’t you come out and see how we did this before you got here. Think of it as a chance to see the way we’ve fished for the last hundred or so years, and then I can explain the way we used to fish before that.”
The offer snapped Rhaxiid out of his confusion and he brightened. “A learning experience? Wonderful, we’ll make a day of it!” His hands shot out to grab both his wives’ and Kalai could feel the vibrations in the floor from where he was excitedly tapping his feet.
“If you don’t mind hard, smelly work. Uncle Willy always called it ‘the worst desk in the prettiest office.' It’ll be a bit cramped, but I’ve got room on the boat for a few guests and observers; four I think would be ok. She’s a working boat, not a pleasure cruiser,” Andy explained. That sent the whole lot of them excitedly talking among themselves.
Kalai was about to lean in to talk to Mama Aftasia, but Andy caught her attention first. “I don’t suppose you’d want to go back out on the water, given you just got back from pleasure-boating-”
Kalai’s heart nearly jumped out of her chest. “I wouldn’t miss it for my own colony planet!”
--------------------
Kalai stood on the pier, bundled in her thermal sailor’s coat. It was still dark and the wind blew from the north in a cold little morning breeze. Kalai took a deep breath and reveled in the smell of the fresh sea air. The soft chattering of Mama Sakalbi’s teeth broke the silence. “It’s a bit chillier than it said it was going to be.”
“The water always does that. It’s never as warm as the lubbers say it’ll be,” Papa spoke as he handed her back her thermos of hot chocolate.
Papa stood next to Kalai and nudged her with his elbow. Even in the dark, Kalai could see him smile up at her and jerk his head at the shivering Erbian. He was also wearing a thermal sailor’s coat, and his hands were stuffed in his pockets to keep them warm, just like Kalai’s. “Landswoman,” he whispered to her and the two of them shared a knowing smile. It was strange, but welcome when she'd told Papa about her upcoming day fishing with Andy, and he’d politely requested to join them. Papa Rhaxiid had graciously given his spot up to accommodate her birth father. Narny was all for it until Andy had explained what they were going to do, but then surrendered his challenge to the fourth guest space, not wanting to go anywhere NEAR anything that could see him come face to face with a Lion’s Mane Jelly. Sitry had done a happy little dance when she found out, but only yesterday had come down with Thistle Fever, and was bundled off to bed by her parents. It left Kalai, Mama Sakalbi, and Papa to accompany Andy on his fishing trip.
The water brushed against the shore behind them quietly. In the gloom, Kalai could just barely make out the outline of the nearest island mountain, but only because the stars had disappeared behind it. It was almost four in the morning, but Kalai had managed a catnap on the shuttle to the empty little lot that had been the boat launch. Aside from the water, the world was silent. Even the breeze made almost no noise and a sense of peace surrounded them. Everything was so calm, Kalai felt like she didn’t have a care in the world.
In the distance, a low rumbling sound of a motor rose from being almost imperceptible to a rolling drum of thunder. From around the point, two green floating lights sped through the darkness, and a spotlight turned on. The beam of light moved jerkily until it came to rest on the pier where they were standing and Kalai started waving her arms. Sakalbi’s omnipad rang, and Andy’s voice shouted over the speaker and the background noise for them to shine a light on the edge of the pier to help him park the boat.
Kalai and Papa moved closer and turned their omnipad flashlights on and waved them as the boat swung gracefully around and glided in alongside them. Kalai caught the rope that flew over the railing of the boat and she heard more than saw Andy moving around on the deck as she tied off on one of the mooring cleats. Several lights clicked on and the deck was bathed in light enough for Kalai to get a clear view of the boat they’d be spending the day on.
Andy hadn’t lied. Kalai saw that this little vessel was a working boat with no frills at all. When he’d told her they’d be going fishing, she’d envisioned something like the charter boat papa had taken her on out of Nantucket. Sporty, fast with a nod to comfort and function. This was not that at all. A giant wheel as wide as Kalai’s outstretched arms that looked like a sideways spool of thread was secured to the deck amidships and dominated the deckspace. Wrapped around it was a fluorescent green tangle with a line of oblong white and yellow corks and rope. There was a covered hatchway sitting behind the drum in front of the raised step to the enclosed cabin. Two large windows let the light out to two children’s bunks, a little table with a booth seat and a raised captain’s chair in front of the helm and engine controls. Andy shut down the engine and that peaceful stillness returned.
“Oway there!” Kalai called, “ship oway! Request permission to come aboard.” Kalai gave the traditional greeting of a Shil’vati sailor.
“Permission granted! Anyone need a stepstool?” Andy finally stepped into the light and Kalai got a look at him. He was wearing a hooded sweatshirt and the same bright orange coveralls she’d seen the fishmongers wearing on their date.
“I wouldn’t mind a hand, Mr. Shelokset.” Papa He’osforos braced a foot on the railing of the boat and Andy pulled him up.
“Just call me Andy, Doc, and welcome aboard. Jackie should be along any minute now with the day’s groceries, and the cabin’s out of the cold. You can get yourself set wherever you find comfortable.” Papa nodded and disappeared around the other side of the wheel moving towards the bow.
Kalai helped Mama Sakalbi into the boat next, and she quickly ducked into the cabin that took up the entire stern section save for a little ledge that ran along the outside. Andy gripped Kalai’s hand and she smiled as he pulled her deftly aboard. The boat rocked a little on its mooring, and Kalai almost fell into Andy, who wordlessly put his arms around her waist to catch her as she lost her balance. She flailed for a moment before she steadied herself against him.
“Gotcha,” Andy smiled, and Kalai could see him flush almost as much as she could feel herself doing as their noses almost touched. Those big dark brown eyes surrounded by white orbs drew her in and she felt she could lose herself in them. Kalai started as Andy danced her around him and moved her towards the cabin door.
“It might be a little cramped for you in there, but the Mary Jean wasn’t built for pleasure boating, she’s a working girl. Sit tight, I gotta check a few things in the back.” Andy patted the railing affectionately before he hopped up and scooted along the outside of the cabin towards the stern. Kalai couldn’t help the little longing groan that came out as he left her there on the little tiny quarterdeck. Her heart was hammering in her chest as half formed fantasies danced at the edges of her mind.
“I saw that, little minnow.” Papa’s voice was soft, but his tone and the sudden broken silence nearly gave her a heart attack.
Kalai could only stammer as her father stared at her with a cocked eyebrow. A thump from the cabin window behind saw an amused Mama Sakalbi daintily sipping at her thermos with her ears twitched forward in interest, staring out at her. “Papa I… he-”
Papa moved carefully around the covered hatchway to stand next to her, leaning back against the cabin window and heaved a sigh. “I must say I’m surprised. This lovely man’s got good clean lines and is very well cared for. It speaks well of his Skipper.”
It took a full minute for Kalai’s brain to process that he was talking about the boat and not Andy. “And the way Andy brought him in smooth in near complete darkness? It gives me confidence in his abilities.”
Kalai breathed a silent sigh of relief and exasperation. Although she was happy to be spending more time with her father, bringing him on what she’d hoped would be a sailing date wasn’t exactly what she’d had in mind for ‘family time’. He wants me to find a nice young man and spend time with him on a boat, but the first chance I get Papa decides to clam-jam me.
From up on shore, the sound and lights of a large human vehicle screeching to a halt heralded the last of their party to arrive. Kalai heard the clomping footsteps coming down the pier and moved to the railing to lend a hand.
“Ahoy Mary Jean! Raggedy Andy, you there?” Kalai stared with wide eyed surprise to see a human female, loaded down with plastic bags and sporting two human weapons on her shoulder. The two of them locked eyes, and while Kalai didn’t understand everything the girl shouted in surprise, she had caught and understood the phrase, “What the fuck?”
“Easy now, they’re my guests, and the one inside is the boss!” Andy appeared on the pier instantly before either Kalai or the woman could react further.
“Ya didn’t tell me we were having pur-” The woman glared at Kalai and her father. She had switched to Vatikre thankfully, but her tone was hostile as she dropped everything but her weapons. “I mean, hwun’eetums, aboard. A gal could get the wrong idea pretty quick in the dark when there’s no warning.”
“Knock it off Jackie. Let’s get the grub aboard and shove off.” Andy picked up some of the bags and took the guns as Kalai offered a helping hand over the railing. “Oh, Kalai, this is Jackie. Jackie? Kalai. That’s her dad over there, Doc He’osforos. He saw and treated Kay Tee a few years back.” Andy jerked his head towards the direction of Kalai’s father as she held out a hand to the human girl. On a quick inspection, she appeared to be about the same age as her and Andy. She had a round face and was about as dark complected as Andy was. She was shorter, only a few inches taller than Papa, but when Jackie grabbed Kalai’s hand to hop up onto the rail, she could feel the strength and the compact muscle hidden by the baggy sweatshirt and pants.
“Wait a minute, did you say Mini-Me over there saw Kay Tee? You’re fuckin’ with me!” Jackie stumbled a bit as she hopped down onto the deck with a loud thunk and advanced on Papa who shrank away at her advance. “You saw li’l Kay Tee? Where the fuck is he? Is he alright? Is he still fighting the good fight?”
“Last I saw, yes, he was ‘fighting the good fight.’” Papa looked over at Andy with a slightly worried expression. Andy smacked the girl in the back of the head, causing her to flinch and she opened the door to the cabin for Andy to go inside.
Jackie rubbed the back of her head and laughed. “Well that’s a little bit of alright, innit? Maybe today’s gonna be a good day after all!”
“Jackie, get suited up and get on the bow. I need a good pair of eyes on the roller horns,” Kalai heard Andy shout from the cabin, followed by a whole lot of thumping and banging from cabinets being opened and closed.
“You got it, ol’ man. We going to your place or mine?” Jackie sidestepped in and opened a tiny little closet and pulled out a set of rain gear that was identical to what Andy was wearing. Kalai collected herself and stood in the doorway next to her father as they both leaned in.
“Mine; Chuck said the Yaw’much are running from the South. We’ll do a set nor’west of Lummi in the Rosario and see if we can get some Fraser Kings,” Andy replied as he turned the engine back on and the vessel roared to life.
“Chuck? Isn’t that one of your cousins? I didn’t know he could keep track of the movements of Salmon, may I ask how he does it?” Mama Sakalbi perked up as she pulled a set of earplugs out of a pocket and inserted them.
Andy prevaricated a bit, looking from Jackie back to Sakalbi then to Kalai and Papa. “I’d rather not answer that-”
“Breakin’ the law, breakin’ the law! Breakin’ the law, breakin’ the law!”
Jackie began singing a human song, and Andy threw her the dirtiest of looks as she finished getting into the orange coveralls. Mama Sakalbi sputtered as Andy shrugged apologetically.
“Make a hole!” Jackie called, and she and Andy came back out as Kalai and Papa made room for them. Andy hopped back onto the dock to cast off while Papa ducked into the cabin.
“Can I help?” Kalai offered as Andy shoved the vessel off and leapt the gap over the black water below.
“You want to be useful? Come forward! I could use an extra set of eyes!” Jackie called back, and Kalai felt a slap on her shoulder from the boisterous human woman.
------------------
Andy stood at the helm, watching Jackie and Kalai as he leaned to get a better view of them past the Net drum. The bow was lifting up again, and the gentle little swells became like speed bumps, jostling them up and down in a predictable bouncing rhythm.
“Are you sure you couldn’t slow down, Andy? It’s a bit rough, don’t you think?” Sakalbi was hanging on to the table and her thermos with a worried expression on her face.
“I could, but we’ll miss the morning set. We want to bomb out the buoy right when the tide changes. If we’re lucky, then we’ll get around seventy or eighty by slack tide this afternoon and call it a day.”
“How do you know where to fish?” Dr. He’osforos was making a good show of standing and maintaining his balance with his hand on the booth.
“Well, there’s two ways you know. The first is you fish the spots your family’s fished since time began. Every family has about two or three different secret spots that we know there’s fish in, and we’re pretty defensive about their locations. The second is by smell. Right now it’s the tail end of the King season, and you can smell them in the water.” Andy turned and saw the incredulity etched on the faces of the two aliens.
“No, I’m serious! King Salmon slime is really pungent, and you can smell them when they’re close to the surface. We get to the fishing spot and take a deep whiff. If we smell them, we’ll set the nets.” Andy laughed at the disbelief on their faces as the GPS on his omnipad beeped and he turned to sail around the last buoy and head for the fishing ground.
“I’ve never noticed that in any of the Kings we’ve raised-”
Andy suppressed a laugh as they caught a larger swell as they left the lee of Lummi Island. Andy reveled in the feeling of weightlessness as the deck rose up and fell out from underneath their feet, leaving everyone suspended for a moment in midair before falling back down. A massive spray of water rose and washed over the deck, drenching Kalai and Jackie, who were still forward. “Cloned and farmed Kings don’t have that same smell. Wild ones smell and taste different, I’m telling you!” Andy pulled back slightly on the throttle as they climbed the next swell. “Brace!” he called as they climbed and fell once again.
There was a look of fear on Sakalbi’s face as she gripped the table for dear life, but to Andy’s surprise, the Doctor looked completely unfazed, and was handling the rise and fall of the deck like an old salt. “You look like you’ve done this before, Doc.”
“I’ve done a stint or two at sea before,” he spoke, in the same tone Andy would have used when trying not to sound too confident, and Andy smiled.
“Kalai keeps talking about loving the sea and sailing. Did you teach her to sail?”
“Yes, me and her mothers. When they were home, we would take the family yacht out in the Vaascon Straits and sail around the Occidiens. Kalai practically spent all her early childhood on a sailboat.”
“And almost every waking moment on one in Junior Academy. I swear you couldn’t dig her out with a trowel when she wanted to go sailing,” Sakalbi managed to add in a word as the boat slowed, and the dramatic rise and fall of the deck slowed with it.
“What about you, Mr. Shelokset, did your father teach you to sail too?”
“I was too young before he passed. My Great Uncle Willy taught me after I came home, and Grandma took me out to the family fishing sites when she wasn’t busy with the Council. For the first two or three years after they let us come home, fishing was the only way to feed our families, but the Militia and the Cambrians would try and sink our boats or arrest us whenever we tried to go out.”
“And that’s why you’re so good at maneuvering your vessel in the dark with no instruments?” Mrs. Vaida had folded her arms, and her voice twinged with that imperious tone she’d had when they’d first met.
Andy huffed a dry laugh. “I did what I had to for me and my people and to survive, Ma’am. I don’t like breaking the law or dodging lasers and gunfire, but there’s a lot of poor families that need to eat.”
The GPS beeped, and Andy gave Mrs. Vaida a slightly defiant look to counter her furrowed brow. “We’re here,” he said as he threw the engine in neutral and opened the cabin door.
Andy walked out and took a deep breath, but all he could smell was the net and the exhaust from the engine. “HEY JACKIE! WE SMELL MONEY?” Andy yelled out as he took stock of the sky. The first signs of sunrise were chasing all but the morning stars away and a light fog was rolling in from the north.
“FUCK YEAH I CAN SMELL ‘EM, ANDY! LET’S BOMB OUT AND GET BREAKFAST GOING!” Jackie looked slightly manic as she smiled brightly. Kalai, on the other hand, looked wet and miserable as she shivered, arms wrapped around herself. Andy gave his cousin a disgusted look as he pieced together what had happened. Every deckhand learned when to duck behind the raised bow and the roller horns that guided the nets so as not to get a faceful of spray when cutting through a swell. It was also a classic hazing trick for Senior Deckhands to let Junior Deckhands learn this the hard way.
Andy moved forward to stand in front of the two of them. Kalai was trying to squeeze her coat dry, but Andy knew it wouldn’t do much good until the sun came out. Jackie at least had the sense to look a little remorseful. “Kalai, why don’t you go sit in the cabin and get out of that wet coat. It’s cold enough out here even for us-”
“No way, Andy. Junior deckhand Kally here wants to impress you and get her dainty soft hands dirty! She’s been bragging about being a sailorwoman and wants to learn to fish ‘your way!” Jackie gave Kalai’s shoulder a wet slap as the poor alien woman went blue. Out of cold or embarrassment, Andy couldn’t tell.
All Andy could do was shake his head and huff. “Ok then! Secure the buoy and sling on my mark. I’ll get us in position!” Andy couldn’t help but chuckle as he heard Jackie start ordering Kalai about. Andy went back into the cabin and looked in the closet/bathroom to see if there was anything hanging up that he could give Kalai. There was only the one rain slicker and a few of Andy’s old sweaters from when he was a lot smaller. Well, looks like I’ll just be cold today. He quickly stripped out of his sweatshirt and grabbed the slicker before throwing a switch on the main control. Dr. He’osforos and Mrs. Vaida threw him quizzical looks as he went back outside wearing less than when he came in. He was down to a sleeveless shirt and his coveralls, and the morning breeze cut right through him and he braced his jaw to keep it from chattering.
“We’re ready to go- Andy, why are you practically naked from the waist up?” Kalai was staring wide eyed at him as he approached her and Jackie was on the bow. Jackie had everything ready; the buoy line was strung through the horns and ready to toss out. A giant orange and blue beach ball sized float hung at the end of the line to mark the end and make it easier to pick up later.
“Trade me your coat for these. If Jackie’s putting you to work, you’ll need these to keep warm.”
“I’m alright, I can-”
“I’m the Skipper of this boat, and I’m ordering you to take off that wet coat and put these on; and Jackie?” Andy gave his cousin a long and piercing look. “Give her the elbow gloves, not the halfsies.”
The scoff and the muttered Salishian profanities meant he’d read the next prank she’d had in mind right. She was planning on giving her the cloth gloves with only the palms and fingers coated in rubber. While perfectly fine for fishing, Andy knew they tended to get soaked through very quickly and did nothing to keep jellyfish stingers and fish slime off your hands. Kalai sputtered for a moment before she complied gratefully and she accepted the dry clothes and rain slicker.
Andy saw Jackie give him a strange look before looking back at Kalai, but he paid it no mind. He walked back to the controls on the drum and switched off the hydraulics, placing the mechanism in neutral. “SLING IT!” Andy called as he took the small jerry rigged steering wheel and threw the boat in reverse. Kalai jumped as the line started unspooling the net into the water at a rapid pace.
Andy set an ‘S’ bend in the quarter mile long net, zigzagging backwards until they came to the end of the line. Andy stopped the boat as Jackie tied off the other large buoy and tossed it over the side, unstringing the cork-line from the roller horns in the process. He pulled hard over and put a bit of distance from the net before shutting the engine down. The line of white and yellow corks marking the net bobbed lazily with the swells as silence settled over the water again. The waves rocked the boat gently as Andy found his sea legs again.
“Alright, I’ll get breakfast going. Jackie, Kalai? Post the watch for seals,” Andy called as he walked back into the cabin to fire up the tiny little gas stove.
Sakalbi, having found the confidence to stand at last, poked her head out of the cabin and stood on by the hatch to the fish hold. “Seals? Why would you need to watch for seals?”
Andy grit his teeth and looked over from where he was cracking open and scrambling eggs. “They’re the spawn of Satan and we hate their guts!” Andy bit out. Jackie came back and pulled the two shotguns and a pair of binoculars from the closet. Andy reached over to a side cabinet and pulled out a box of shells for them. Both his boss and the Doctor’s eyes got wide.
“Seals are the enemy of our blood. Were it not for the invasion, our unending war against these vermin would continue to this day!” Jackie growled as she loaded one for herself and rested the other on Andy’s seat at the helm.
The look of growing horror on Sakalbi’s face towards their facetious declarations caused Andy to chuckle a bit, before launching into an explanation. “We’re not fans of the species because they’ll wait until a fish gets caught in the net and then they’ll steal it, costing us a fish AND ripping a big hole in our nets that we then have to take time to repair. We use the shotguns and buckshot to give them a nice welt and convince them not to hang around, because they’ll wait up on the surface and watch the buoys, just like us. A single seal can and will take between five and ten fish. The worst is when they start getting full, they’ll just bite out the bellies of a salmon in the net. We can’t really do anything with that fish once it’s ‘seal-bit’. So yes, as fishermen, we hate them.”
“Learned opportunism in apex predators as a response to human activity… I think I’ll go see this behavior for myself!” Sakalbi practically rushed out the door towards the bow where Jackie was sitting on the roller horns explaining to Kalai how to spot the bastards, leaving Andy alone in the cabin with the Doctor while he cooked breakfast for them all.
Dr. He’osforos sat down heavily in the booth and pulled out his omnipad. “I’ve had a word with my friend in the Interior. She’s pulled the warrant for your brother, and I’ve withdrawn the charges I filed.”
Andy froze and turned around slowly. The only sound was the sizzle and pop of the eggs and chorizo that he’d added to them in the skillet. “You mean… it’s done? He can come home?” A wave of light headed euphoria swept over Andy and he swayed with the gentle rocking of the boat. “I will pay you back, Doc-”
The doctor held up his hand and stopped Andy. “We’ll call it even, but there’s something… I was able to get my hands on this,” Andy watched as the doctor swiped something towards his omnipad and it dinged. “What is it if I may-”
“Are you really asking an Indian to tell you a story? Because it’s going to be a long one if you are.” “I’m Sevastutavan, young man; we invented long stories.”
Andy froze and stared at the screen of his omnipad. The Vatikre was heavily accented, and Andy had a bit of trouble with the unfamiliar accent, but centered in the frame in a hospital room, sitting in a wheelchair, was a Salishian boy. Andy blinked in surprise as he stared at the screen. “Is that-”
“I am Ikw’is’hi’ehlah, and this bearer is… of the Orca Clan Sheloksets. I drove our Haida enemies onto the rocks and took many heads when they attacked our winter village on Orcas Island. I signed the Treaty with the Great White Father and I fought against the slavers of the south-”
Andy wanted to grab the omnipad but the smell of overcooking eggs brought his attention back to breakfast and Andy stirred and scrapped the food quickly, trying to save it.
“I asked her for any materials she could give me on your brother. Pictures, recordings, anything. This is what she gave me. It's the last known recording of your brother during an interrogation conducted by a Navy Commissar prior to his escape. It seems he made friends with a Pod of Deaths Head Commandos. Quite a bit of the recording has been redacted, but… there are portions of it where he talks about his family and his history. I thought you might like to have it.”
Andy hurriedly pulled out paper plates and a slice of bread for everyone and scooped a heaping portion of the chorizo eggs onto them. He handed the doctor his before leaning out the cabin door. “Slop’s on, come and get it!”
Andy sat down after moving the shotgun out of the way and started the video over again as the three women came back to grab their plates and lost himself watching his brother start telling his story.
“What’s that?” Andy heard Kalai ask over his shoulder, and he paused the video.
“That’s my brother! That’s Kay Tee!”
“Holy shit, what?” Jackie nearly shoved Kalai into Andy as she jammed her bread slice down her gullet and crowded in to see the screen.
Andy started the video over a second time and they watched in silence. “God, that brings back memories. Back when mom was still alive and before we broke up the warband. I can’t believe that slippery little punk ghosted a pod of Commandos for two fucking years! Holy shit, that’s badass!”
Before Andy could say anything, Sakalbi started coughing and brought the binoculars up. “Uh, Andy? Jackie? What do we do about sharks?”
Jackie looked at Andy in confusion. “Sharks? There’s nothing but Dogs around here.”
“Well those are shark fins and they’re charging the net!” Sakalbi pointed and Andy looked up to see dorsal fins charging the center of the net.
Andy looked at Jackie and spoke the same words in tandem, “Oh shit!”
​
First:
https://www.reddit.com/Sexyspacebabes/comments/yz0u3h/the_cryptid_chronicle_chapter_1/
Previous:
https://www.reddit.com/Sexyspacebabes/comments/13nh0oe/cryptid_chronicle_chapter_29/
Next:
To be posted 6/4/23

Saw my first Mahler 8 tonight, my first Mahler ever actually at Cincinnati May Festival.
I definitely understand why people enjoy Mahler now. I’ve tried to listen to his symphonies before, but never could get into them. I probably will never really be into him like some, because my interest in music comes from opera. I don’t know enough about orchestra to properly appreciate it, I’d say.
But I think I did the perfectly worse amount of research on the piece before I went. I knew there were eight soloists, but didn’t realize that one of them would not be onstage singing at all. I am supposing that the 3rd soprano part is supposed to be offstage per the score?
I searched Mahler 8 on here and found a picture from the recent La Scala performance with seven chairs onstage. I need someone to update the Mahler 8 Wikipedia with this kind of information.
They also had the children’s chorus seated in one of the balconies to the left, and some offstage brass. And the soloists moved around the stage for different sections, disappeared and reappeared. I wasn’t expecting so much choreography.
I feel like my enjoyment of the piece was a bit tainted as I tried to figure out where Lauren Snouffer was the whole time.

My girlfriend doesn’t watch anime and if I were to convince her to try a movie what would y’all suggest? I’ve heard good things about your name and a silent voice so those are two that I’m considering. I think she is hesitant to watch anything since it is animated and I’d like to show her something that allows her to look past that! Any help would be appreciated!

So as the title says, I’m looking for one specific episode of the podcast that I’ve seen before. It was the first one I’d ever seen, and I’ve been watching on YouTube for a while now, so I thought it would be fun to go bs k and rewatch again, but I can’t seem to find for some reason. I originally found the podcast from a YouTube short clip and then went to the episode to hear the full story. The story was about a wife who was asking if she was the A-hole because of something like she wanted her husband to give her one big gift for a holiday instead of a bunch of little gifts she didn’t really want or something like that. If I’m not mistaken, it also took place at the set with the big wooden table they use to sit at if that helps. And it was just Morgan and one of the other girls I think, but I can’t remember which. But I’ve searched and searched and I can’t seem to find the episode again. Can anyone help please?

Timestamp (Boards) Timestamp (Keycaps&Switches)
Clearing up some more things, prices include shipping. Local in 91776. Bundles preferred. Comment before PM.
Keyboards

Item	Details	Price
Mechwild Mercutio 40%	Millmax, Brass (Gold) Knob, Usb-C, Durocks V2. There is one bridge and would recommend installing some EVA foam under the PCB if you're planning to buy.	$60 shipped
Mechwild Clunker 40%	Soldered with Lubed Creams (w/ 415keys UHMWPE rev.4 stems), Durock V2, black knob, solenoid. Including all the creams x68 total and additional 415key stems.	$90 shipped
NiZ Plum 66 (2020)	(Electro Capacitive) Wired. Original Plum keycaps (shined, new Apollo clones, sliders & springs all lubed with 205g0. Stabs lubed. Orignal box and accessories invluded.	$80 shipped (keycaps bagged)
Keyhive Nightmare	3D Printed case from KeyHive. Soldered with a mix of Akko Swithes, Micro USB, Flashed and ready. Top and bottom case isn't seatted flush (I built it in one-go and never opened it up to check).	$50 shipped
Segmented 3D Printed Keyboard w/ white rice :)	Proto, there is some flaws in the 3D printed pieces, tho all is functional. Soldered YMDK GH60/64 PCB with Akko Matcha and Radient red (Lubed). Random Keycaps from Aliexpress and Durock V2. Reference to Build	$50 shipped
Mammoth20 (Wireless)	Mammoth20 E-White built, all foams, PC plate, 2 knobs (1 was a replacement), 2 batteries (1 currently installed, 1 extra - wiring not assembled), stabs are lubed with 205g0 and BDZ.	$230 shipped
Freebird TKL WKL	Black, hotswap, POM plate, has some scratches around the housing's edges. 90 lubed MMD creams, Durock V2s, 21kb Red Korean, Graveshift 40a o-ring, stock o-ring, case. Willing to part out if requested.	$210 shipped

​
Keycaps and Switches

Cannonkeys Minty	New (Opened to inspect)	$50 shipped/ $40 shipped in bags
Cannonkeys Earl Grey Lavender	New (Opened to inspect)	$50 shipped/ $40 shipped in bags
KFA White on Navy	Like New (Used on a board for a short time, no shine)	$50 shipped/ $40 shipped in bags
Kinetic Labs PolyCaps Whale	Like New (Used on a board for a short time, no shine)	$50 shipped/ $40 shipped in bags
Domikey Astronaut All in One	New (Opened to inspect)	$100 shipped/$90 shipped in bags
Monokei Series 1 WOB	New (Opened to inspect)	$50 shipped/$40 shipped in bags
JWK Lavender Linear	90 count, stock	$45 shipped
Novelkey Creams V1	68 counts, older-batch, lubed 205g0, 105 on springs.	$50 shipped
Zaku Linear	95 counts, lubed 205g0, 105 on springs, and clear tx filmed	$110 shipped
BCPs/Cthulhus - (Milky Top, Kalih Burgundy Stems, JWK Bottom (NK Silk Emeralds))	96 counts, lubed 205g0, 105 springs, and black deskey filmed. 63.5g springs from Silk Emeralds.	$100 shipped
NK Silk Emeralds w/ Cherry HG Bottom	Stock (stems are factory lubed), 109 counts	$30 shipped/$20 with keyboard purchase.
104 Keys Transparent ABS Blank Keycaps OEM Profile	New, got these pretty cheap from Amazon	$Free with any other item.

Bonjour Montréalais et Montréalaise,
Je suis à la recherche des meilleurs restaurants à volonté de notre jolie ville. Que ce soit pour le dîner ou le souper, l’objectif est de pouvoir tout goûter !
Quels sont vos endroits préférés pour profiter d’un festin sans fin ? Que ce soit de la cuisine asiatique, italienne, mexicaine ou autre, je suis ouvert à toutes les suggestions.
Partagez vos expériences, les plats à y goûter ou ce qui vous y plaît. Si vous avez aussi des recommandations avec un bon qualité/prix, je suis preneur !
Merci d’avance pour vos partage et à bientôt autour d’une table.

Hi! Hope you’re having a great night/day! :) Single 42/F/US, I’d love to watch one of these shows or movies together with a great single guy right now (each on our own devices) while we chat! :)
Here are the shows/movies I’m interested in, please let me know your age, location, whether you’re single, and which one you’d like to watch together in your intro. Looking forward to hearing from you! 😊

• “Step Brothers” on Max
• “The Founder” on Netflix
• “Bama Rush” on Max
• An episode or more of “Seinfeld” on Netflix
• An episode or more of “Parks and Recreation” on Peacock

After watching Roman Empire, Vikings (and all things viking for that matter), and then watching Knightfall, I decided I wanted to start watching all these historical based fictions, documentaries, and so on in a chronological order in a fun way to sort of piece together “history.” I say that with quotes as the fictional pieces clearly can’t be considered history but I’d like to piece it all together in my head like a timeline leading up the modern times.
As i started looking to add more history based shows to my list, I realized there is a lot of them. Has anyone already begun a list somewhere with the same idea?

I just watched their family guy play through and they were talking about how they wanna try and get that up and running. I played it a long time ago when it was first released and I gotta say it was freakin sweet Lois.
Definitely need to see the guys play it. I know the servers were shut down completely but I wonder if there’s anyway for fans to get a version that’s similar up and running sorta like club penguin rewritten. It be freakin sweet to see Justin,Matt and Ryan all playing on separate computers just fucking around.
Was thinking maybe as a group on this subreddit we can all try and get it up and running somehow, maybe even try and get some help from the family guy subreddit. It’s a long shot and very unlikely but I feel it’s definitely worth a shot. Plus I mean we’d all be able to hop on as well.
Idk just a thought.

First playthrough, wanted DoA south of the river heading to Blackwater, is there a story point where I get access to this area without being shot at, or have I royally stuffed up somehow? Please no spoilers

[First] [Previous] [Next (coming soon)]
Mick's pistol because I want a cover image
Mick reference
Random drawing of Finn
Memory transcription subject: “Mick”, Venlil, Former mechanical engineer, Gunsmith apprentice
Date [Standardized Human Time]: November 17, 2136
​
We lined up outside of the facility where our first competition would be held. The official rules would have to be explained to us before we started, as is standard for these events. Finn had already given me most of the knowledge I needed, but I still had to listen to the instructor’s words, unless I wanted to do something wrong and be disqualified.
​
“Alright, is everyone here?” The instructor shouted. “Nobody unaccounted for? Perfect! I see some new faces here today, so I’m going to have to go over the rules again.”
​
“First up, the basic safety rules must be followed at all times, no exceptions, ever! Understood?”
​
The line of about 20 competitors all barked out an affirmative in unison, I followed shortly after.
​
“Good! Good. Second rule, prioritize safety above all else. If you see someone doing something wrong, or dangerous, or outright stupid, point it out to me or one of the other safety guys around. Understood?”
​
“Yes sir!” The whole line responded.
​
The instructor’s presence was quite hard to ignore, it seems this man has a history of yelling at people to get points across to their head.
​
“Good! Alright, third rule. Have fun, don't die.”
​
“Yes sir!” we all said again.
​
“If nobody has any questions, we shall begin! Whoever’s first, go to the line, hands on the door, then wait for instructions. I shall follow suit shortly. When you’re done with the course, make your way up to the catwalk, the view’s great from up there, trust me. For now, sit and wait for your turn.”
​
Finn turned to me and added onto the instructor’s advice. “Hey Mick, don’t expect to be able to sprint through the whole thing like last time, pace yourself, depending on how they set this up, this course could take anywhere from a minute to 10, we won’t know until we’re both done. They don’t want people to cheat, taking it blind is part of the fun with this style of comp.”
​
Finn looked a little tense, as if the anticipation was getting to him. I knew it was getting to me too, so no wonder it was getting to him. A while ago, I figured out that I didn’t feel things quite the same as most everyone else did. Things that made others incredibly disgusted only made me a little uncomfortable. I didn’t feel loneliness even after days worth of isolation. All of the time I spent was either working or sleeping, I didn’t feel the need for free time, and I liked having a lot of surplus money, so I worked. That was, at least until I found the exchange program. It paid a decent amount of money, so I was compelled to join up. These humans couldn’t be so bad, plus I needed something new to do. Fortunately, I had previously passed empathy tests, albeit barely. It registered enough of an empathetic response for me to pass undetected. I was legally free of predator disease.
​
Apparently, a few of the earliest exchange partners had a bug where they could share images, and we had that bug, so I got to see the humans' appearance way earlier than most. Bipedal, tall, forward facing eyes, mostly hairless, wearing textiles to replace their lack of hair. That didn’t bother me too much, unsurprising considering my overall lack of intense emotional response that had prompted the earlier PD screenings.
​
It had been about [30 minutes], about half the competitors had already gone through the course before us. My turn was up next, and Finn was right after me, we were just waiting for the competitor currently in the course to finish.
​
A bell chimed, signifying that the last guy had made it through, finishing his run. Finn gave me a pat on the back, a sign that I should get ready to get in there.
​
“Remember to pace yourself, you know, you can’t run through this behemoth in 20 seconds. Slow and steady will win you the race.” Finn advised.
​
“Alrighty, next competitor!” The instructor bellowed, almost interrupting Finn’s advice. “Minek the Venlil? You ready?”
​
“As ready as I'll ever be, I guess.” I said, anticipation and nerves high.
​
I don’t necessarily like talking to people, particularly the ones I don’t know. Another aspect of why I felt like my home was better set on earth, rather than that sunside town where everyone just had to stop and get to know you. I’m not going back, even under the threat of annihilation, like what nearly happened to all of earth’s inhabitants.
​
“Make ready, put your hands on the door, your run starts once the timer beeps. If the lights turn red, stop your run immediately, make clear, holster your weapon. Understood?”
​
“Understood.” I replied.
​
I seated a new magazine into my pistol, racked the slide, holstered it, and placed my hands on the door. Here was my time to shine, I guess.
​
“Shooter ready? Standby…”
​
The moment of silence between the announcer’s callout and the timer’s beep felt like a small eternity.
​
BEEP!
​
I popped the door open as quickly as I could, took a high-ready stance, and began steadily advancing through the entrance hallway. There was a door on the left, as I entered it, I see a target standing both behind a target and a hostage. I'm forced to take my time lining up the headshot, KRAK, the target fragments into digital fragments. Another target to the right of it, slam a round through its torso. Move on, 2 targets behind a barricade, one no shoot. Take out both targets swiftly, then take a peek around the next corner. At the last moment, I spot a somewhat hidden cranny in the course right after the hallway, on my left. I backpedal, swing the pistol around the corner, and plant a round square through the chest of a target that was hiding within.
​
Now actually going down the hallway, there’s another hallway on the right, and a T-junction at the very end. The hallway on the right has 2 targets right next to each other, shoot and no-shoot. I take this quickly, they aren’t overlapped or anything special, just next to each other. I nearly missed because I was still moving when I shot, I needed to take more time lining up, no way I could keep getting this lucky. Left side of the junction has a shoot target, the right side has another hallway to the left of it. The rest of the floor was mostly the same, sending rounds through targets and reloading once, much like the rest of the course, right up until the end of the floor.
​
I rounded a corner partially blocked by a non-target, to see a small shooting gallery within the killhouse, and a door on the opposite side of the entrance. I have to clear the targets before the door will open, as instructed by the label on it. Two small, circular holograms appear before my eyes, roughly in the middle of the room. Two pops later, my magazine has run out. I haven’t even gotten through my (slightly) practiced reload, when another set of targets appear on the left side of the room. The surprise of more targets caused me to fumble slightly, tapping the magazine against the bottom of the grip. I slap the magazine back into its rightful place within my pistol, tap for good measure, drop the slide, pop the targets. The door remains still, so there are more targets to hit, I reckon. They happened to appear right I thought of them, one close and to the left, the other far and to the right. This forces me to swing my aim across the room, and I nearly missed a target again, barely clipping the right edge of the far target.
​
Too close, me. Too close. I somehow haven’t missed a target yet, and I intend to keep it that way.
​
The door finally opened, so I made my way through, and made my way up the stairs that followed the door. At the top of the stairs stood a target peeking over. Almost reflexively, I was steadily advancing past the target, without stopping I put the barrel to the target’s face, then fired. 2 rounds remaining in the magazine. The left side had a familiar set of targets similar to the little practice house. A set of closet like rooms, filled with a couple of shoot and no shoot targets. Bang, round the next corner, bang and a clack. Empty, reload, don’t fumble it this time, another target around the corner, bang.
​
The next few hallways were similar to the rest, a no shoot around a corner, a shoot target sitting opposite that, then I saw something I hadn't seen earlier. A direction marking on the floor, telling me to walk past the door, to a piece of half-height cover leading into an incredibly long (for this type of scenario) hallway. At the end was a hostage type target, held in such a way that you had to either hit the slightly poking out head, or the very exposed leg sitting out to the right of the target.
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I take a bracing pose against the left side of the wall, on the corner. It took me a moment to line it up properly, but I sent a round flying through my target’s lower thigh, causing it to stumble out of line with the hostage, the hostage remaining exactly in its position. That’s interesting, I didn’t know the targets were dynamic like that. I had been “killing” them with direct chest or headshots for every shot that I had hit, so I had never gotten a chance to see these targets actually do their dynamic animations before. I’ll have to ask how that works later. I finished the target off with a nice shot to the chest, after it had fallen to the floor, crippled due to its leg injury. The target fragmented as the holographic display was pierced by my round, double confirming that these targets were still projections.
​
The door to my left had opened with a clunk a moment after I had shot the target for the second time. I preformed more of the same clearing maneuvers and shooting of targets. A pair of these targets happened to line up, almost perfectly for a collateral shot. I took aim against the target further to the rear, my round propelling itself toward the target with its aim true. It took a path where I thought it would destroy both the near and far target with the same shot, however, the bullet only grazed the first hologram, causing it to stumble backward with its dynamic system. Despite not killing the first target, it still smacked against the rear target with a standard killing shot, fragmenting into its hundreds of red shards that I had become accustomed to.
​
Advancing further into the labyrinth, I swiftly finished off the wounded target that had stumbled backward into a corner. Just to the right of the target, a sign on the wall pointed me downward, telling me to crawl through a claustrophobic, vent-like passage, about [2 feet] tall. I read the sign, dropped to the floor, and slid down through the little hole in the wall. Out the left of the hole, a target stood waiting for whatever round I planned on giving him, out in the open.
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I wonder…
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I approached the target, pistol held like a little baton. With as much force as I could for good measure, I slapped the target with the pistol.
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Whiff
​
Seems I was wrong. I place my aim onto the target that I had unsuccessfully slapped, fired, then went to move on. Another target was in a little closet behind it, so I spun around to shoot that one too. This killhouse seemed to span for an eternity, and I thought I must be nearing the end of it soon.
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Round the corner, no-shoot target, keep going around the U shaped hallway, another no-shoot target in the middle of the hallway. Pass it by, another bend in the wall, with a shoot target just beyond it. I go to fire my weapon, and…
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Click.
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The slide is open.
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That isn’t supposed to happen, I had 3 rounds left in the magazine!
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I take a quick inspection of my gun, a casing got stuck in the chamber, and now was blocking up the entire gun’s mechanism. I had been taught what to do in this situation, the malfunction being called a “double feed,” which could occur more frequently if your gun ran older ammunition, which mine did.
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I followed the standard jam-clearing procedure for a double feed, which was to first lock the slide to the rear, remove the magazine, drop the slide and rack again to remove the stuck casing, reinsert the magazine, then rack the slide again to seat a new round. With my jam now cleared, I shot the target in front of me in the face, destroying it instantly. Around the corner sat another set of targets, 2 of them I had to shoot.
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I get my aim steady on the first, fire, target destroyed. The slide locked back, alerting me to my state of being out of ammo. I reach for another fresh magazine, and come back empty handed.
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FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
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I was completely out of ammo, and making good time up until now.
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Melee won’t work, I had just figured that out, I'm out of magazines so I can’t reload even if I needed to, which I certainly did.
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AHA!
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I had accidentally let the stuck round fall out with the magazine while I was removing it from the gun, so now it was sitting on the floor. I dive over to it, grab the lonesome round off the floor, and carefully insert the round into the chamber of my pistol. This was a technique that you weren’t exactly supposed to do often, as it wears out the extractor much faster, leading to more frequent issues if it’s done too often. I drop the slide, letting the final round I had to my name seat itself within the chamber, ready to fire.
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BANG.
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The target shattered, the door on my left clunking open to reveal the light of day, and a catwalk to a platform above the range. I walk out, and hear another voice call out.
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“Show clear, then holster your weapon. Your time is…187.87 seconds, nice work in there. If you want, go watch from above from that catwalk, the next run’s boutta to start.”
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I walked up the stairs, legs quite a bit more fatigued than I expected them to be, although I had just been speed-walking for 3 minutes straight, and my heart was beating faster than I expected, probably due to that moment of panic after having my gun just jam up on me, compounded by the fact that I totally ran out of ammo. I reached the top, took a seat in a nice spot near the edge of the small congregation of other competitors, waiting for Finn to come waltzing through the course. There was a display on the top of the roof, showing us an overlay of the first floor, which would also show us the second floor once the competitor got to the staircase.
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A few minutes passed, and I wasn't paying attention to Finn's run, since a few people had asked for me to take pictures with them, which I reluctantly agreed to. I could barely hear it, but the end timer from earlier had spoke up again; “show clear, holster your weapon. Your time is… 178.92, fastest time yet, good stuff.”
​
I broke away from the group who were trying to ask me questions to meet my friend at the top of the stairs, who acknowledged my completion with a firm ‘high five’, a human gesture I had been taught over my time with him.
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“Phew, nice little course, huh Mick?” Finn offered.
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“Yea… It was fun, albeit tiring.” I responded, with a tail wag
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“I’d bet, worse stamina especially. Anyway, how’d ya do?”
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“Slightly worse than you, 187 seconds.”
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Wow! Nice, uhm, that’s actually really impressive for someone who’s never done this kinda thing before, how’d ya manage that?”
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“Might be because I only ever had to hit the targets once, except for that really long range one, with the hostage?”
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“Yea I know the one, tricky bastard to hit without clipping the hostage.”
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“Did you know those targets are reactive? Actually yea, you probably do because you volunteer here, right?”
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“Yep, I'm guessing that’s how you figured out they are? Shot em’ in the leg so he’d stumble? That’s the easiest way to do it, i reckon, but just moving to the right edge to line up an easier headshot is the more advantageous way to do it.”
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“Yea that’s what I figured out. Oh, after that there was one kinda standing out in a hallway that I tried to hit with my pistol, didn’t do anything but since that one actually fell over earlier I was wondering if I could save the ammo, why didn’t hitting it work?”
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“If you were actually in a situation where you were running around a big ol’ building trying to murder combatants inside to rescue hostages, do you think you would have the ability to whack someone in the face hard enough to outright kill them instantly? No, no you probably wouldn’t. The target impact system only tracks bullets anyway, punches or strikes don’t move fast enough to register on the system.”
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“Oh, interesting. Say, how do the holograms work?”
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“No clue, all I know is it has something to do with laser projectors and some weird illusions, then it has motion detectors tuned to a specific zone in space for tracking hits, quite interesting stuff if I do say so myself, even if I don't know how it works.”
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“Yea, it is,” I said, not exactly registering what was said, “anyway, I think we should go figure out what the next event is, I don’t want to go into it blind like I would have if you hadn’t made me try the little version first.”
“Alright, follow me then.” Finn said, then began walking down the catwalk, leading me to our next event of the day, which I had been informed was a “long range vintage” event.
​
We made our way back over to the range we were at before, now situated with targets much further out than the aim trainer I had been using earlier. There were large signs, telling me distance next to little plates with concentric rings around a point in the middle. Finn walked back over to his car, pulled out a rifle box, and came back over to me.
"Ah, the wonders of long range shooting! You ready to learn about physics?" Finn exclaimed, clearly excited.
"No, not really, why do you ask?"
"Long range shooting, and especially extreme range shooting need a lot of little physics calculations for you to actually be able to hit the target from so far away. Bullets are little more than projectiles thrown at high velocity, but there's still things like gravity, wind, and sometimes even the fuckin' Coriolis effect to worry about while your round is flying!"
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"Wait, you have to worry about the rotation of the planet while shooting long range? That's insane!"
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"I know, right? that's why I love this stuff!"
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The next [20 or 30 minutes] were taken up by a lengthy explanation of how a bullet flies, how a spotter and shooter system functions, how a spotter scope works, how to interpret what the spotter says, the list goes on. This had continued until the whistle blasted again, alerting us of another announcement.
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"Everyone come over to the podium, we're having an awards ceremony! Be here in 5 minutes or we start without you, if you aren't already over here!" the voice of the instructor from earlier rang out. Finn and I went over to the podium, where a few boxes labeled 1, 2, and 3 resided.
​
The ceremony went well, apparently I had gotten third place, Finn got second, and someone who had ran after both of us got first.
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After the ceremony, we were each handed a box of differing sizes, the winner got a certificate for a free rifle, Finn got a new 'plate carrier', a thing that was made to hold armor and magazines, and I got a pair of cargo pants.
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I walked over to the little station they had set up nearby, got a few measurements taken, then was handed an (admittedly very fancy) pair of pants, clearly set up for humans instead of venlil.
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Thankfully, I didn't have to modify them so I could wear them, there was already a little bit of a notch in the top of the beltline that let it comfortably sit just below my tail.
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Another announcement came on soon after I got my new pants; "Next event starts in one hour, get some practice in before that, you might need it."
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Author's note: This one took a lot longer than the other ones, although it's released in a shorter time frame, how ironic, i guess? I'm considering making a prologue to the story, probably during the exchange program, if I do, it will also help give some more context to Mick that I tried to expand on with this one.
I hope you enjoyed it, expect the next one... eventually.
Oh, and sorry about any walls of text, that was me trying to fill in to hit my self imposed 3000 word count, and also me not knowing how to effectively write "move, shoot, move again" about 20 times in a row.

hi. watched a movie and thought I’d get messages but nvm I’m alone still. no creeps, and text me w something fun not simple 😋